MY GRADE: 
It seems as if musicians David Byrne, REM, Jackson Browne, Pearl Jam, T-Bone Burnett, Billy Brag, Bonnie Raitt and a handful of other performers are up in arms, demanding to know whether their music was used in the torture of Guantanamo Bay detainees (see Darren Garnick’s article on it here)
Frankly, I have to admit I’m in favor of musical torture. Why? Well, first and foremost, it seems to be working. See what the terrorists themselves are saying:
Ali Hamza: “Aaaargh!!! Stop! No more Michael Stipe! Sure, I dug REM’s early stuff but ever since Bill Berry left the band they’ve really been coasting. (eyes go wide) Hold on, what is — NOOOOOO — NOT “SHINY HAPPY PEOPLE,” I BEG OF YOU! Where is your decency, man? Please, just hook my nipples up to a car battery and put me out of my misery!”
Muhammad Abbaas: “Oh my God, this new U2 album is cruel and unusual. Could Bono and company do me a favor and stop with all the trendy new-age-y musical meandering and write a decent melody every once and awhile? I thought Rattle and Hum was self-indulgent but this one takes the cake! It’s certainly no Joshua Tree. I surrender!”
Ghazi Salahuddin: “Pearl Jam? Really? Hello? 1991 called, it wants its CD back! Can’t I at least be tortured by a band who’s cracked Billboard’s top 200 in the past ten years?”
Brahim Yadel: “You are shit out of luck, CIA stooge, because I happen to love Jackson Browne. Especially Late for the Sky and Running On Empty. (looks up, suddenly trembling in fear) Wait — that album cover! You are not going to cut my hair like Jackson Browne, are you???!!! Stop! please! I will reveal all!!!”
So really, pompous musicians, I ask you — what is the problem here?
T-Bone Burnett– is using your music for CIA torture any more despicable than you re-mixing old Who songs in order to pimp for Pepsi?
And… Billy Bragg? Let’s face the facts, Billy. These days, Gitmo detainees forced to endure your music probably accounts for at least 75% of your listening audience.
There’s a time to be sanctimonious and a time to be grateful.
Funny post! But I think they have a valid point. If I were a musician, I wouldn’t want that which I perceive as art being used inhumanely. What if those prisoners were released and decide to take revenge against me!? Or every time my song came on the radio, a few ex-prisoners go into convulsions? Rap is another story.
[...] Goldstein’s OUR ANNOYING WORLD — “Billy Bragg? Let’s face the facts, Billy. These days, Gitmo detainees forced to [...]
Good point. If the detainees are ever released it is a danger to the performer.
Still, for Billy Bragg, it may be worth the risk (so as not to fade into obscurity)