Our Annoying World

In the last few weeks both 24 and LOST have ended their series.

LOST ran for 6 seasons, 121 episodes.  I don’t know how many of those were two hour episodes — probably a handful –  so let’s just say that’s approximately 125 hours of television.  Allegedly great television.  I say “allegedly” because I only watched the first episode of the first season.  I’m 120 episodes behind and have no immediate plans to catch up.  Not because I hear it’s crap.  But because I hear it’s good and I don’t want to get hooked.

Because, let’s face it (125 hours divided by 24) the question is — is it “5 days of my life” good?

Is anything that beams onto a screen truly “5 days of my life good”?

Lost, 24, M*A*S*H, Jaws and 3 sequels.  Just wonderful stuff.  And in the case of Jaws: The Revenge.  Wonderful and personal (this time)!  But when it comes down to it, would I rather have that time back?

I’m pretty sure I’ve listened to Rick Springfield’s “Jessie’s Girl” at least 150 times.  Catchy tune, right?  Right.  But the math is terrifying.  Song length: 3 minutes 15 seconds.  multiply by 150.  Divide by 60.

Dude, I’ve spent like 7 1/2 hours of my life listening to Jessie’s Girl. That’s hardly Bucket List material.

Here are a few other time-sucking regrets I have (aside from blogging, of course):

LAMEST Time Wasters (Cumulative lifetime statistics)

• 1 hour and 27 minutes — waiting in line for Mister Toad’s Wild Ride at Disneyland.  (Pretty exciting and trippy, but a shot of absinthe would have by just as effective)
• 17 hours — waiting for water to boil to make Kraft Mac and Cheese (always runny, so yellow it’s creepy, never cheesy enough, too many simple carbs)
• 19 hours — watching 2003 World Series (you lost to the Marlins, Yankees?  Really?  The Marlins???!)
• 3 hours — listening to U2′s last album (it’ll get better soon, right?…  Right?)
• 10 minutes — I Can’t Believe it’s Not Butter vs. regular butter, blind taste test.  (Result:  I can believe it’s not butter.)
• 97 hours — traffic on the 405 freeway.  (turns out it’s not as entertaining as it sounds)
• 1.5 hours — watching both Best Sound and Best Sound Editing Oscars being given out.  (Come on,  life is short.  Let’s combine!)
• 3 days — horrendous case of food poisoning from eating at Wendy’s All You Can Eat Taco bar in summer of 1993  (Sorry, Wendy’s but the tacos weren’t that good)